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Consider the Birds of the Air…

Trees?  Who needs trees?

Trees? Who needs trees?

“Consider the daffodil.  And while you’re doing that, I’ll be over here, looking through your stuff.” –Jack Handy

I live in a city, name of: Bremerton.  It’s more like a large town and it is about an hour’s ferry ride out of Seattle, Washington.  It is only a city in the most technical way.  It’s built in a grid pattern and we have a police department, and a fire department.  It is called the Bremerton Fire Department.  Its initials are BFD which are painted on the back of the fire engines.  I guess no one is in charge of checking these things, but it doesn’t inspire confidence.  Anyhow, in spite of its smallness, my town has the tendency to be very busy.  I live on one of the busier streets.  My street is so active that if I wake up in the night and it is quiet outside…no car noise…I can guess confidently about the time of morning it is…dead quiet means 2a/m to 4a/m.  I woke up the other morning it was dark and quiet, clearly later than 2 a/m.  Then I noticed a single bird chirping, so daylight was coming sooner rather than later.  I guessed it for about 4a/m.  The thought occurred to me that what I was hearing was the early bird…you know the one about which your boss or dad always told you. 

I started thinking about this industrious bird out there all by himself eating all those worms.  Then I thought: What a stupid little bird, if only he kept his mouth shut he could eat all the worms that he wanted.  He could just feed on worms while all of the other birds slept lazily.  Why was he drawing so much attention to himself?  I imagined what would happen to a bird who ate worms silently and greedily.  His slight body slowly turning into Jabba the Hut with wings…or if not Jabba per-se, another member of the Hut crime-family.  I can’t imagine their body types are too dissimilar.  I guess this type of bird behavior would lead to another platitude.  “The mid-morning raccoon gets the fat bird.”

The adage: “The early bird gets the worm.” is one that was born of a need to motivate workers whose productivity didn’t satisfy their superiors.  Or, if it wasn’t born of that need, it quickly was disfigured into such.  It carries with it the weight of competition.  It’s peer-pressure…a begging of the question: “What have you done for me lately?”.  The only thing about which a boss truly cares.  Leastwise the good prolific bosses whose bosses inquiries are also thinly veiled.  What indeed.  “Consider the birds of the air”, he said to his boss on his last day of work…

The song-bird in my yard had no fear of competition.  It was not worrying about what other birds might come and discover the fruits of his diligence.  Don’t get me wrong there is plenty of competition in the animal kingdom.  I’m sure that this bird knew, on some level, that more birds equal less worms per bird.  What struck me that morning was his lack of worry.  He was just eating and singing.  He was not committed to either to the point where he could be robbed of the joy he found in both.

I really have no envy of birds, they posses very few attributes that I would find useful.  It was surprising to me that flight, the characteristic I’ve envied most about birds as long as I can remember, became the second most attractive aspect of the bird.  At least it was in the moment I shared with that bird in my yard.  The connection that we shared that morning was so intimate that I nearly shed a tear when I shot it.  It was too early and I needed sleep…sleep deprivation really tends to cut into my productivity…at least that’s what my boss says his boss says…


About pats0

Pats0 is a writer who is informed by a punk-rock ethos, and a hatred for group-think. He is the founding member of The Pirate-Clown Guild of Free-Thinkers, an aegis from under which he soils the internet with his thoughts. Welcome.

4 responses to “Consider the Birds of the Air…

  1. Darla ⋅

    Love this 🙂


  2. That was thoughtful.. would’ve liked a graphic description of bird being shot, bullet smashing tiny skull to tinier bits.. feathers flying.. but what does it mean? i don’t know.. but it COULD mean this…

    Let’s get political.
    It’s the bird’s “yard” as much as it is yours… you are to the bird, what US policies are to many individual unlucky citizens of whatever war we happen to be in. That individual (assuming they are innocent and actually just a person trying to live life in a place that isn’t here, the US) gets blindsided by a bullet because some crazy people on the other side of the world need to control your country, land, resources, make sure oil production is suppressed so said oil is in demand, holding prices high and profitable. I’m sure you know all about it so i’ll leave that be. You felt like shooting a bird… that’s ok.. but hope you didn’t wake the neighbors with gun fire!!

    Aside all that… it was well written, maybe what it means is.. if you go along with platitudes… that’s usually well and good.. but the negative outcomes are hidden until you discover it for yourself. But at that point it’s too late. Shot in what you thought was your own backyard.. doing what everyone always said was a respectable way to live. And there you are, singled out… shot down in your prime, doing what you love most to do.. singing.. eating.. probably thinking about flying over to the red tree and banging some bird broad. Then hitting the nest for a little R&R. That’s the last he knew.. now he’s chilling in the big nest in the sky.. RIP Bird.

    Or would that bird consider us like giant bi-pedal monsters that smash and burn the rest of the animal kingdom at will? Like their own bizarre “planet of the apes” or in this case, birds.

    I feel as though proper homage has been paid to the bird. And now i’m wondering if birds have sex? I assumed so.


    • pats0

      Thanks Mike…yeah it could mean all of that…to me it’s a post about what we value as a consumerist capitalist society and how that doesn’t seem to affect birds much…I didn’t really shoot the bird…I was just being absurd…like I admired the bird for not getting caught up in the rat-race, but I had to shoot it to keep my edge in said race…I love getting comments like this…for me it is the ultimate compliment that someone would read something that I made and have a reaction to it


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